How to Win Friends and Influence People to Buy From You
— Online and Off
By Trevor Jones
In a world flooded with options, attention is currency. Whether you're selling face-to-face or through a screen, the secret to influence isn’t manipulation—it’s connection. Let’s break down the timeless art of winning people over and gently guiding them toward a purchase, the right way.
1. Make It About Them, Not You
People don’t care about your product—they care about what your product can do for them. Instead of listing features, highlight transformations:
- Not “this face cream has vitamin C,” but “you’ll wake up glowing.”
- Not “this course has 10 modules,” but “you’ll be earning on autopilot within weeks.”
Speak to their desires using their language. Whether it’s a neighbour in a coffee shop or a visitor on your website—focus on them.
2. Be Genuinely Interested in People
Dale Carnegie famously said: “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than in two years by trying to get people interested in you.”
Online, this looks like:
- Replying to comments and DMs.
- Asking questions in your emails or posts.
- Remembering your buyer's name or past order.
Offline, it’s about listening, not pitching. Let people talk. Let them feel heard. The more they talk, the more they trust you.
3. Tell Stories, Not Just Stats
Facts tell. Stories sell. Instead of saying “this works,” show it through a real or relatable journey:
- A tired dad finally making money online.
- A mum turning her side hustle into her main gig.
- A teen selling digital art to fund college.
Paint the picture. Let them feel the outcome before it happens. Online? Use testimonials, case studies, or your own journey. Offline? Share relatable examples during conversation.
4. Build Trust Before You Ask
People buy from those they like, trust, and respect. Here’s how you build that:
- Consistency – Show up regularly, through emails, videos, or posts.
- Value First – Teach, entertain, or inspire before asking for a sale.
- Authenticity – Be yourself. People spot fake a mile off.
Offline, that might mean giving free advice before charging for coaching. Online, share valuable free content, a sample, or a mini-guide.
5. Use Soft Influence, Not Hard Persuasion
Don’t push. Pull. Use subtle techniques:
- Curiosity – “How would your life change if…?”
- Scarcity – “Only 3 spots left for this month’s coaching.”
- Social Proof – “Over 5,000 users now use this exact template.”
Let people make the decision—but give them a reason to act now.
6. Be Clear, Not Clever
Confused people don’t buy. Whether you're speaking or writing:
- Use short sentences.
- Use everyday language.
- Make your offer crystal clear.
Avoid fluff. Be direct but friendly. Make sure they know exactly what they’re getting and how it helps them.
7. Keep the Relationship Alive
The first sale is just the beginning. Check in after a purchase, say thank you, invite feedback, offer something extra, make them feel special.
Online? Use email sequences, bonuses, or surprise messages. Offline? A handwritten thank-you note can be surprisingly powerful.
The goal isn’t just to win a customer—it’s to earn a fan for life.
Final Thoughts: Influence Is About Integrity
The best salespeople aren’t pushy. They’re passionate. They care. They connect. Whether you’re messaging someone on Facebook, emailing your list, or having a chat at the pub, remember:
“People may forget what you said, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou
Make them feel seen. Heard. Valued. The sale will follow naturally.